23 Days

Another day closer to my little girl turning five. Another bad day for me. After Paul taking the kids yesterday and me sleeping almost the entire day and crying every time I thought about her I didn't think I would have another bad one. I was wrong. Today I sold a pair of Kailee's little shoes from when she was smaller. A pair of Pumas Paul got her when she was much younger. He actually bought her, me, and him some Pumas. So it was definitely a bit hard for me to let them go. No she can't fit them nor has she for some time, but I found myself super sad. I thought back to when she was that age. Just remembering how small she was. And, I miss that. Trust me I love where she is now, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss her when she was smaller. I just keep trying to remind myself of all the fun she's going to have when she starts school. I tried talking to Paul about everything I was feeling and just felt so stupid looking at baby pictures and crying over her turning five. I sure hope at some point it gets easier for me to deal with.